I remember it well. My beautiful two-year-old daughter is sitting in the middle of the living room playing with her toys, with her back towards me and me calling her name multiple times. No response. No turning head in my direction. Nothing.
My heart sank into the pit of my stomach because what I had been thinking was being confirmed: there was something wrong with my precious little girl.
Were there other signs that something was wrong? My mind raced through memories, pictures, and videos; to my dismay, there were other signs.
Table of Contents
- Non-stop Crying During Diaper Changes
- Distant Gaze
- Crying During Outings
- Lack of Joint Attention
- Food Texture Sensitivity
- Sensitivity to Fabric Textures in Clothing
- Lack of Eye Contact
- Limited Language Development
- Reduced Sensitivity to Pain
- Extreme Sensitivity to Unexpected Loud Sounds
- There is Hope
Non-stop Crying During Diaper Changes
Early on, constant crying during diaper changes was another indication that something was not right. I remember switching to pull-ups before the customary time because of the horrible diaper-changing experience.
Distant Gaze
There was also the far-away look, gazing into the distance even when you tried to catch her attention. She would be engaged with her toys and suddenly stare into space. I would step before her, but she would look past me. Something was not right.
Crying During Outings
Outings with her were now almost impossible. She would cry anytime she would go inside a store or market.
I remember, specifically, when she was nine months old, taking her to a store to get her picture taken and her crying through the entire session. You could tell she was disturbed by the changing backdrops, something about the sound.
The photographer’s efforts to catch her attention became futile. We walked away with pictures that sadly still remind us today of how uncomfortable she must have felt.
Lack of Joint Attention
You are told not to compare, but I had to! A toddler around the same age as my daughter was playing in a park, pointing with her index finger to a noisy airplane passing by. The little girl looked at the plane and then at her mother to make sure her mother was noticing the same thing.
As I observed the scene in front of me, I thought that my daughter had never pointed or tried to catch my attention in this way. Another notation was added to the growing list in my head.
Food Texture Sensitivity
When we first started solids, everything seemed fine. There was interest in the different flavors, and things seemed good until more texturized foods were introduced.
Time and time again, the thicker textures began to be refused. No “here comes the plane” worked; she refused to open her mouth to the thicker textures. Eventually, she added odd-smelling foods to her refusal list, which limited the list of what she enjoyed eating.
Sensitivity to Fabric Textures in Clothing
At the same time, my daughter became highly attuned to the various textures on her skin. The sensation of certain sweaters or clothing tags became very uncomfortable for her. You can find out how we dealt with this sensitivity and others by clicking HERE. If it rained and her socks got wet, she would need to take them off. One more item added to my mental checklist.
Lack of Eye Contact
Eye contact, furthermore, was non-existent. When my daughter needed or wanted something, her eye contact was appropriate; however, when you talked to her about something, eye contact was fleeting at best. It felt like she was not paying attention to what we were saying. Communicating with her had become a struggle. To learn more about the strategies we used to help her with her eye contact, CLICK HERE.
Limited Language Development
At two years old, her verbal skills were limited. As we would later learn, she did not have enough words in her vocabulary.
She would use two-word phrases such as “open it” or “close it.” However, she could sing songs with multiple words, which did not make sense to us, but nothing at this point was making sense.
Reduced Sensitivity to Pain
In addition, we noticed early on that our daughter’s sensitivity to pain was less compared to other children her age.
If she got hurt, she would barely react. We would need to watch closely for other signs to realize something was hurting her. This was scary and difficult because, as a mom, I often had to figure out what was wrong since reactions were minimal.
Extreme Sensitivity to Unexpected Loud Sounds
Equally important, our daughter was susceptible to unexpected loud sounds, as we soon learned.
I remember clearly her first birthday. We were so excited to celebrate it at a children’s gym.
Everything was set; balloons of all colors were decorating the place, and the colorful surroundings screamed “fun.”
Young attendants greeted us with music and playful engagement, ready to give my daughter a day to remember. Family and friends arrived with vibrantly wrapped gifts prepared for a good time. We were so happy!
And then it happened. Everyone was gathered around our daughter, singing Happy Birthday and clapping. I looked at my daughter, who was uncontrollably crying instead of laughing or enjoying the moment.
Nothing consoled her after that, not blowing the candle or being held by her grandmother, nothing! At that moment, one of the young attendants suggested we put her on a little train that went around the place to see if that would calm her. What a mistake! More non-stop crying.
The moment was recorded, once again, in pictures that showed my beautiful daughter’s face completely blotched with red marks from all the crying.
Eventually, we discovered that this sensitivity to unexpected sounds would become the greatest challenge of her life, and it still is today.
There is Hope
If you have read up to this point, you may have noticed familiar signs in your child. However, be cautious about interpreting them as only signs of autism, as many typical children may have similar experiences for short periods and may not have autism. It is essential to consult a physician for a proper evaluation. To read about our path to evaluating our daughter, CLICK HERE.
In addition, each child is an individual. These anecdotal signs are specific to our family. The Center for Autism and Related Disabilities, a collaborative program of the University of Miami and Nova Southeastern University, whose mission is to optimize the potential of people with autism and related disabilities, has an excellent list of early signs; CLICK HERE to review it. If you would like to read another article on the topic, you can go to the Autism Research Institute, CLICK HERE. Remember, everybody’s journey is different.
If your child has been diagnosed with autism, however, and you recognize these signs of autism, do not despair. You will be happy to know that there are many things that you can do, as a parent, to help your child cope and live a happy life. What seems impossible becomes possible with God’s help. Trust me on this; I am living proof!
I will regularly post blogs on all we did to help our daughter cope with many of the mentioned issues. I hope you find encouragement and practical advice that you can immediately apply to your family life. You will also learn about the struggles that we continue to face.
Consequently, I hope that you find this little blog helpful and encouraging. I am committed to sharing everything I have learned that has helped us in our journey. Together, we can celebrate our successes and our struggles, knowing that our children are a gift from God, just as they are. We are stronger than we think, and our children are even more resilient and stronger than we are.
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